Wedding Invite Etiquette - NEED YOUR THOUGHTS

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by TallOak10, Jan 11, 2018.

  1. Jim_in_PA

    Jim_in_PA Senior Moderator Staff Member

    Nov 18, 2008
    Likes Received:
    We did Option Two. 35 people, including 11 kids. In Key West. If anybody else was "butt hurt"...oh, well. It wasn't my first, but it was The Professor's first. And we wanted to actually enjoy it, rather than kowtow to the masses.
  2. Kelly Harvey

    Kelly Harvey Registered

    Sep 28, 2017
    Likes Received:
    This is brilliant!!! :)
    ChestersMomma likes this.
  3. Alsosusieq2

    Alsosusieq2 Senior Member

    Mar 30, 2016
    Likes Received:
    Congratulations-!! I'd go with option 2 and make yourself happy, it's your wedding. You might get a bit of flack, but I'd hazard that myself rather than despised relatives. Your circus, your rules. Enjoy yourself-!! :)
    TallOak10 likes this.
  4. ChestersMomma

    ChestersMomma Senior Moderator Staff Member

    Nov 17, 2008
    Likes Received:
    This was big for us. If you are huffy about not getting an invite, that probably speaks directly to why you didn't get an invite.
  5. ~tiffy~

    ~tiffy~ Senior Member

    Feb 22, 2008
    Likes Received:
    We are going on a cruise on the 28th. Getting married on it’s chapel on the 29th.
    Then coming home and inviting everyone to the party!
    Our chapter together- our rules. Real friends and family will understand.
  6. wpgrider

    wpgrider Senior Member

    Mar 24, 2011
    Likes Received:
    Yeah, 100% if it was a second marriage, I 'd just invite immediate family and close friends (even better if those close friends were relatives as well). I don't know, I just feel the need to quietly raise my hand and be like "I did option 3 and that's ok too!" because I feel like it's almost frowned upon these days - not saying by MHF people, but wedding forums, etc etc.
    uncanny580 likes this.
  7. mooselady

    mooselady Senior Member

    Sep 9, 2012
    Likes Received:
    It is sad that any couple needs to defend the choices they make for their day. As Tiffy says there, people who care for you should support your choice, people who don’t care, don’t matter.

    Op, stop worrying about what anyone else think, what is it that you and your partner really want, whatever that is, that is what you should do.
    equinitis, HayleyS and ~tiffy~ like this.
  8. ginster

    ginster Senior Member

    Feb 19, 2012
    Likes Received:
    Late to the party but I would go with inviting whoever I want. That would be your option 2...
    I am ready to keel over when I see what weddings cost these days...or more correctly:what some people are willing to spend for one (albeit very special) party. As a banker I do know how many people are willing to go into debt for this.
    Friends of mine did a courthouse wedding, went on vacation afterwards and told people while they were away that they had married. She was 7 mo pregnant at the time. I think they never did a wedding party.
    My sister married just before christmas. Courthouse wedding, a free ceremony with a big party will follow in 2019. They invited family members they wanted to have there. Their credo: "We only want those people there who make us happy."
    I think that is the one thing to go by. Not obligation. Who do you really, really want to share that day with? Voila, your guestlist.
  9. TallOak10

    TallOak10 Full Member

    Sep 12, 2015
    Likes Received:
    We spoke about it all weekend. We decided not to do a HUGE RECEPTION THING, but to have a low key wedding take about 60-70 friends and family out to dinner. We love the idea. We'll have the people we actually WANT there.
  10. MzCarol

    MzCarol Senior Member

    Oct 14, 2010
    Likes Received:
    I was 50 and he 52. First for him second for me. Being 'older' neither of us wanted the crazy wedding you have in your 20's. We had about 50 guests - those we were closest to on a daily basis. We got married on my friends farm on a lovely summer evening in the pine tree grove. We didnt 'hide' from the guests....we were out there mingling ...nibbling wondeful apps. Before the wedding. After a bit we left to change...they took their seats and we held the ceremony. After the ceremony we had a fabulous late dinner by candlelight with piped in music. Everyone had a wonderful time being together and was very intimate and special. There is not one thing i would do differently.

    Above all else....the day belongs to the two of you. Own it and do what makes the two of you happiest. Its not about the party, its about the marriage and life you are committing to.
    ChestersMomma, uncanny580 and ginster like this.

Share This Page