Unmotivated

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by JinxedDream, Aug 12, 2018.

  1. JinxedDream

    JinxedDream Senior Member

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    How do you motivate yourself to workout? To do things?

    I was in a car accident in January. Fractured multiple vertebrae and was in a brace until the end of April. Before that I was in decent shape. Now my heart races if I walk to the back of the pasture to catch my horses. I can mount into the saddle but have major troubles dismounting so I can only ride when my BF is home and within earshot.

    I was in physiotherapy for as long as I could afford it. I get massages whenever I have the money. I have a ton of workouts I'm supposed to do. One was a 30 day program. I got to day 4. I can't even complete one of the exercises. The doctor, my family, everyone is telling me I have to do these workouts. And then I do them, exactly as prescribed. Which results in me struggling to walk the next day or do anything. When I tell the physiotherapist this, she tells me to do a lighter program. So I try that. At the next check-in I get told I'm not progressing enough so they bump it back up. It's turned into a vicious cycle.

    I used to be able to do all of these things. Now I can't even hang out my laundry. I can't carry my favourite saddle down to the arena and I absolutely hate the saddle I can carry. I don't fit into anything other than my Wanglers from pre-accident. I was supposed to re-start one of my geldings this summer... he's now sat in the field for a year. I hired someone to do it for me, but eventing season is in full swing now so I guess he's going to sit for another few months. I've only managed to his groundwork and tack him up. He has thrush which I'm struggling to treat because he likes to use humans as a leaning post, making it a huge challenge for me to pick up his hooves.

    The worst part is, if you see me outside, walking around, I look fine, same as before the accident. So people expect all of these things from me and then angry/upset/annoyed with me when I say no, actually I can not do that. I asked for help carrying my groceries one night at the store, they have a teenager hired to do that, he does it for all the elderly. I can't carry and load all of the bags into my car unless I carry each item one at a time. He flat out refused.

    Thanks for reading my rant. I have a major 3 day BIG final exam in a month (CFE for the CPA). So very stressed about that too.
     
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  2. manesntails

    manesntails Senior Member

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    All I can tell you is how I did it after breaking my back. I pushed past the pain and did it anyway. Took pain pills to sleep and if I was worse sore the next morning, took a hot shower and just kept going.

    You get scar tissue in there and you have to break the scar tissue. It hurts, but eventually, it doesn't.
     
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  3. JinxedDream

    JinxedDream Senior Member

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    I have a fairly high pain tolerance. So when I say I can't complete an exercise or can barely walk the next day, that's with a hot shower, pain killers, everything. Everyday when I try to do some of the exercises (the next level), I literally collapse onto my yoga mat. There's basically 3 levels of the programs I'm supposed to do. I can do level 1, I'll get a bit "workout" sore after but nothing major. At this point the level 1 stuff isn't hard for me. I can do the level 2, somewhat... I got to day 4. When I try to do the Day 4 things, I collapse. I can push through pain but we're talking blinding white-hot pain and most of the time I can't get my muscles to do what they're supposed.
     
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  4. manesntails

    manesntails Senior Member

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    Hsve you gone back to the Doctor and gotten a new MRI done?
     
  5. JinxedDream

    JinxedDream Senior Member

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    On the waiting list. The accident happened in another province, I was treated in that province. Province where I live, I've been on the wait list since the week of the accident. I know I tore my shoulder in some way in the accident. I'm still trying to get someone other than physiotherapy to a) believe me and b) diagnose it for treatment. I ended up in neurosurgery and trauma for the accident. I'm trying to get a sports medicine doctor to look at it but they have a very long wait list. I've damaged my shoulders before... only took 3 years to heal last time o_O
     
  6. PyroTekNik333

    PyroTekNik333 Senior Member

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    I have more to add but I'm short on time.

    Just wanted to jump in on the workout stuff. You might try going to level2 stuff for part of the workout or for every other day until you can do it full time.
    As you've seen, going until you collapse is a recipe for failure and relying on pain meds to get through a workout is a really good way to get addicted :(

    I'm dissapointed that your doc is pushing you for faster progress and not seeming to take your pain level into account. Yes you need to push past what you can currently do in order to progress but they shouldn't be pushing you to the point of collapsing!

    Do you have someone who can go with you as an advocate?
    Do you downplay your pain/struggle with the prescribed exercises?
     
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  7. manesntails

    manesntails Senior Member

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    That's most likely it. You need to get loud and insistent. You need an MRI. You have undiagnosed issues. You are not kidding or faking it. Something is torn. May not get you to the Dr. faster, but they can put it in your records.
     
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  8. doublelranch

    doublelranch Senior Member

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    If you still have issues that need to be found and treated from the way it sounds, have you tried walking for exercise? If your heart is racing just from walking to the back pasture, it sounds like your cardio is in the tank. After my heart surgery, I started walking and slowly built up the challenge. I added in hills, uneven ground, and then heavier boots. It can be enjoyable as well if you add in the change of scenery. I'm sure you are mentally drained and exhausted after everything you have been through.
     
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  9. Mcdreamer

    Mcdreamer Senior Member

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    I was in a car accident two years ago and continued having severe pain even a year after. I even posted about it on here. I had to get pretty insistent with the doctors and it turned out the hospital missed the fractured rib. Which, of course, there is nothing to do about, but I did finally have a treatment plan and PT.

    Have you ever tried yoga? Yoga can be very good IF you listen to your body and only do what your body CAN do right NOW. It is a wonderful way to build strength and also focus on your breathing which can really help after trauma.

    My doctor was pretty blunt with me and said that really bad car accidents can mess you up for life. We may never be the same physically but we can figure out how to do things differently.
     
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  10. Mcdreamer

    Mcdreamer Senior Member

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    PS.
    i did some EMDR therapy after my accident. I really struggled emotionally after. The guy ran a stop sign going 50 mph and totaled my subaru forester. I didn't see him until it was too late and I had my dog with me in the car. Really freaked me out. The EMDR was helpful.
     
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