I've mentioned about this horse here and there but I've decided to make one big post about her from start to finish and would like an honest opinion about her. I'm on the fence as to whether I should keep on or just give up with her. Got her as a yearling. She was friendly, I could pet her and she was halter broke and leaded fairly decent. Day 2 after owning her I had a 13yr old mare attack her. She grabbed her by the neck and tried pulling her thru the fence. After that she would let us catch her but then after about 5 minutes of leading her she'd just freak out, and flip out. She'd bolt, get lose and then run scared to death and was extremely hard to catch. I started leaving her in the round pen and I messed with her everyday, multiple times a day. Just entering the round pen would cause her to freak out, she'd run and run and one day she jumped the gate and broke it off. I finally got her over this and she has been easy to catch ever since. At 2yrs old I was going to break her to ride. Quickly realized she was not mentally mature enough. I worked with her a TON on the ground. She lunges great, moves shoulders, HQ, and side passes. Backs up like a dream, would spin etc etc all on the ground. I'd saddle her and work with her with the saddle, I'd set up obstacles and do them as well. At 3 I decided to break her to ride. I started hauling her to barrel races so she could see the sights and sounds. And I'd leave her tied to the trailer with hay. She was doing great, she'd yell out some at the other horses but nothing too bad. When I went to break her to ride I thought it shouldn't be a bid deal since I did so much ground work with her. I was wrong. I got on her and she didn't really buck that bad at all, nothing out of the ordinary and she only did it when I first started loping her. But she did something else. She would try to side swipe everything to try to get the bridle, saddle and me off. One day she did it and my foot got hung in the fence when she side swiped it and then she spooked and I got jerked off the back of her and got hurt pretty bad. She had her teeth done and all to make sure nothing was pain related. Everything was good to go and I finally got her broke. At 4 I started trying to ride her at shows, she was broke and riding well at home. She'd get a little rowdy at home from time to time but at the time nothing I thought was to unusual. When I say broke I mean, broke well. Like reining horse broke. I take her to a show and was gonna just ride her around, no competing or anything. Remember I had been hauling her since 3. I saddle her up, she does fine. I get on, she does fine. I ride her on out to to the other horses and she flips the hell out. I ain't ever seen anything like it and I've trained other Colts and I've seen them spook and shy at other horses while being ridden but this was insane. This horse starts bolting, bucking, rearing, biting me in the legs, snorting, and flying backwards. I couldn't get off. And I've come to realize that when she does get this way you have to be really firm with her. I kept hauling her and trying to ride her, same thing kept happening. Decided to try a different approach and started leading her to where all the other horses were riding and working her on the ground. I could tell other riders were irritated by this but I was desperate and willing to try anything. I finally got her to where I could enter the warm up pen. It wasnt pretty, and she was on edge and I knew one little thing would set her off but we made it. I kept doing this and I got to where I could ride her, then i started being able to lope her with the other horses, again wasn't pretty and she was on edge and if one got to close she was ready to bit or kick. I then decided to try to exhibition her on the barrels (we had been trotting them well at home and,was gonna trot thru at a show). Just for exposure purposes, so she'd be by herself in the arena and the others outside the arena. Didn't go to well, didn't listen at all, real reactive and sensitive and when you tried to stop her she'd over exaggerate and stop but kinda jump up and almost hit me in the face with her head (in was spitting hair out lol). She'd shake her head, pull against me and try to bit me. I had to stop hauling her due to school and how dangerous she was, if i got hurt I'd get kicked out of school. 5 yrs old till now at 8 yrs old I've rode her off and on at home and I plan to ride her a lot more now with my new job. I was hoping she'd grow up mentally and be ready to try hauling and really riding again. But to be honest I don't think she has. She's still reactive to other horses at home, I tried trail riding her with her pasture mate and she was even scared of her a little and acted like she wanted to kick her and shy from her (even tho they've live together since she was a yearling). Then yesterday I was riding and she got set off by a culvert. She has a culvert in her own field . Anyway she sees this one, starts humping up, trying to bit me, trying to bolt, and hops up. After trying to ride her thru it and she just kept getting worse about it I finally I had to get off and work her from the ground and then she got to where it wouldn't bother her. The whole time she's zoning in on the neighbor horses so I had to get her attention constantly, then again I had to get pretty firm with her. Finally she started thinking and then did what I was asking. When trying to do barrels with her at home she's always easily distracted by the neighbor horses and she so sensitive when I start to go around the barrels I have to watch my legs constantly cause if not she'll get ticked off and reach around and try to bit my legs. One day she grabbed my pants and almost pulled me off. (She only does this stuff when shes irritated and wanting to focus on the other horses and when im not letting her focus on them). I've tried kicking her numerous times in the mouth when she does it, but she still does it. As far as riding I have no problems with her at all. If there are absolutely no distractions she rides like a dream. Finger tip control, will spin a hole in the ground and do anything you ask. I've wondered if this was a hormone thing related to her being a mare and maybe some kind of imbalance. But now I'm kind of wondering if this is just a thing with her. Like mentally, quirky, and just something she'll always be like regardless of how much I ride or haul her. I see how things set her off and it makes me wonder "how is this horse mentally going to be able to handle running barrels?" "What if a kid is running behind the fence at the second barrel?" I've wondered many things. I also sometimes feel like she's the type that will drag you if you did go to fall off and get hung up. She has been my dream to run barrels on because she's so quick and athletic, but I'm wondering if I'm wasting my time. Been wondering this a lot lately. I thought about selling her just because I would have no use for her if she couldn't run barrels really. I mean I can't pony Colts off her, I tried breeding (vet said it would calm her down) lost the baby twice, can't really trail ride cause I don't wanna go by myself and get hurt and no one be around to help me and at the same time it doesn't look like I can ride with other people. I love her to death, and I fear she'd go to the slaughter because of these quirks. But at the same time my dad keeps telling me to sell her because I'm wasting my time and no need to feed her for 30 yrs when I already have 2 more that I'm feeding till the day they die. I mean if i kept keeping them all before long I wouldn't be able to get another one to ride and I wouldn't have anything to run barrels on. If that makes sense. I've thought about spaying, marbles, regumate, and other supplements and I've thought about just continuing to work with her and trying to haul her but at the same time I don't want to waste my time if she'll just mentally never be a barrel horse. And the horse is like the energizer bunny, she never gets tired. The other day I'm riding at home, my neighbors horses run up to the fence, she gets antsy and focuses on them. I start working her, circles, figure 8s, roll backs, etc, the whole time she's doing it, it's not pretty cause she rushes and loses her form, and she's trying to bit me the whole time, gets very sensitive, starts getting over reactive to everything. Oh and here's another example, I get done riding one day and I'm walking back to my house, my neighbor is about 500 to 1000 feet away (a 5 acre field separates us) she leads her horse to the round pen. Keep in mind I'm leading mine, we're doing great. Next thing I know, my horse bolts, almost knocks me down, and starts snorting at the neighbor horse who's a good ways away, I don't even know how she saw the horse. So I started working her from the ground, all the way back to the house, again she was on edge, and very reactive. It gets discouraging when I think about how much time I've put into her and I see other people with 2 and 3 yrs olds haul for the first time and ride everywhere, and in no time they're doing flawless exhibitions. And I still can't ride comfortably with other horses at 8 yrs old. I tried ponying her off another horse at home to see if that'd help, she bit and kicked me.... I tried riding another horse in the field with her while she was turned lose, she ran and ran, and she'd shy away when I got close, or try to bit/kick me. I was afraid to keep on because I was afraid she'd hurt my other horse if she got one good kick in. Oh, I should mention this horse NEVER bites or kicks, sweetest horse in the world. She only does this when something sets her off and you're riding her. She will not bit or kick from the ground when shes in this mood, only does it when ridden. Kudos for anyone who read this and made sense of it all.