Saying goodbye to horses we love that aren't ours

Discussion in 'Horse Chat' started by Mcdreamer, Jun 9, 2018.

  1. Mcdreamer

    Mcdreamer Senior Member

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    I accepted a job back home in Ohio which is wonderful and also painful. It means I'll be able to stop the long commute from OH to CT every week (thank god) but it also means saying goodbye to a herd of horses I have personally selected and brought into my program, rehabbed, and watched grow into wonderful, hard working fur babies.

    It's the job. But it's going to be the hardest thing I've ever done to say goodbye to these guys. One has overcome seemingly insurmountable trauma and is flourishing. One is so so young and is growing into himself and becoming a sassy, confident, sweet pony. It's amazing what horses can do when they are given the right support.

    My heart hurts to leave them. As I'm sure some of us have this experience--what was yours? How did you say goodbye without secretly loading them all in to your trailer and driving off in the middle of the night?
     
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  2. Alsosusieq2

    Alsosusieq2 Senior Member

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    Sorry you've got to leave them, that is hard. Looks like you made a huge impact on their lives though.

    Probably my neighbors horse when they got divorced and moved. I'd gotten attached to a liver chestnut AQHA mare they had and doted on her but they weren't selling. I still have her in my mind's eye, she was a looker and fast as lightning. Oh well..Not quite the same, but I used to love to take her for a spin for Jim. Would have loved to have talked him into selling her.
     
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  3. jojozwiebel

    jojozwiebel Full Member

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    I'm saying goodbye to my first horse that I leased and took full care of for 5 years... He won't be going far but not worth the risk of visiting him as I don't want any legal or more family problems. I don't know when... Could be tonight.
     
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  4. Alyssa Hughes

    Alyssa Hughes Senior Member+

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    I owned a paint horse and loved her to death, but I had to sell her due to her health issues. I never cry and I broke out balling in front of the people who were buying her. Sometimes you just connect with a horse so well that it feels like you are missing a part of your family when you have to sell or give them back to the owners. Although I wouldn't not own her even though I had to sell her in the end. My first broken heart :(
     
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  5. Pirate

    Pirate Senior Member

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    I used to help out a trainer with a biggish team, whenever one was retiring from racing he'd let me load them in his truck and have a few minutes. He even tried to give me 2 of them but I had no grazing.
    I always had to remind myself they weren't mine and most of the time they were moving on to get the home and attention they deserved.
     
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  6. Rhythm 'n Blues

    Rhythm 'n Blues Senior Member

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    This has been my life pretty much. Ever since I was a teen I was training horses for other people!

    As a teen I was training horses for my coach’s school. If the horse wasn’t schoolie material, or it was going to take too long, or we had a buyer, we sold. It didn’t bother me much at all really. Sure there were a few that I adored, but I knew all the while they were not mine, and I could not keep them.

    Currently I’m still training for the guy who was breeding Dutch WB’s. We’ve sold a few, and while they were lovely horses and I connected with each one in a different manner (same as the ones when I was teen) they were never mine and I knew I could not keep them. We do have 2 left, and the 1 mare is one I’ve wanted since before she was conceived and again once she was born.......and I am seriously contemplating buying for myself. BUT still some things to jump through before that happens. The other one that is left? OMG I wish she would have sold a million years ago. I’ve never liked this mare, she is not at all my kind of horse and her personality isn’t anything I would ever want in a horse for myself. She’s the only horses I’ve ever really trained that I seriously have not liked at all; from birth I haven’t liked this mare. So I will have ZERO issues when she leaves. But the one I’m contemplating buying - if I don’t buy her, I will likely loose it when she sells to someone else. I’ve never in my life liked a mare.......until this mare. :heartbeat:
     
  7. waresbear

    waresbear Senior Member

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    I learned early on.... don't get married to horses that aren't yours. Hard to do, but save the emotions for the ones you own.
     
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  8. Alyssa Hughes

    Alyssa Hughes Senior Member+

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    This is true, but sometimes you still have to make even harder choices for the ones you own.
     
  9. Mcdreamer

    Mcdreamer Senior Member

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    Honestly, I wouldn't be doing my job very well if I didn't invest in cultivating a relationship with each horse. I should have clarified--it's a therapy program--ground based--and I asked these horses to put up with a lot of BS. A lot of them came from awful backgrounds, and for me it's IMPOSSIBLE, not to become emotionally invested when you're bringing a horse back from the brink of death or helping a horse overcome their trauma.
    Still, it IS the job, and I rationally know that I cannot be responsible for every horse i'm in charge of until their dying breath but I wish I could! But I hope I get to be a really good chapter in their book and I'm so thankful for the time with them--everything I have learned and the experiences I had with them. They are good babies and I hope they continue to flourish.
     
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  10. ColorMyWorld

    ColorMyWorld Senior Member

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    Aww that's too bad! Where are you working now? You can PM me if needed...
     
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