Listen to Wuss Horse! Wuss Horse KNOWS!

Discussion in 'Horse Chat' started by slc, Jun 14, 2018.

  1. slc

    slc Senior Member

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    "AHAHAHA!"

    "ALRIGHT, that's ENOUGH! If you can't leave the wheelbarrow alone then you have to go outside and be with the horses!"

    "THE WHAT?"

    "GO ON! SCRAM!"

    "But I...."

    "Go on! If you don't, I'll go get the thing!" (whip)

    "OH go ahead!"

    "Alright you, the thing!"

    "No not the thing! I'll go outside!"

    "FINE." (cleaning stall)

    "HELP! HELP!"

    "No you can't come in til I'm done!"

    "But but but but but! I'm coming in!"

    "You go right back out, you!"

    "HELP HELP! I HAVE TO COME IN!"

    (stands petulantly in stall corner)

    "You can't make me go out!"

    "WHY!?"

    "BECAUSE THERE IS A FLY ON ME!!! It's huge! It's horrible!"(kick kick kick kick kick)

    "Alright, you can stay in if you promise not to tip the wheelbarrow."

    "I won't."

    "Promise?"

    "PROMISE. That was just AWFUL."

    (moments pass.....)

    "AHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

    "WUSS HORSE!!!!"
     
  2. slc

    slc Senior Member

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    "Why can't I have my fly sheet?"

    "Because you look like Larry the Cable Guy with it on. You've outgrown it. It's giving you a severe wedgie."

    "I can wear Ben's fly sheet."

    "Wuss Horse it's a size 80!"

    "I bet it fits me."

    "It's not going to!"

    "I want it."

    "You can't have it! It's an 80!"

    "I want it."

    "Alright, I'll go get it and show you that it doesn't fit!"

    "Holy Christmas. It fits."

    "Toldja."
     
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  3. slc

    slc Senior Member

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    "It appears you're going to give me a bath."

    "It was my plan."

    "I don't think that's a good idea."

    "Why?"

    "The water's cold."

    "The water is COLD? You're a HORSE!"

    "A what?"
     
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  4. slc

    slc Senior Member

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    Wuss Horse: "Did you know this new fly sheet smells funny?"

    "It's not new, it was just in the house."

    "It smells like a cat."

    "A cat was probably sitting on it."

    "I can't believe you gave me a cat blanket. It really smells weird."

    "I didn't give you a cat blanket! Stop sniffing it like that! STOP DOING THAT!"

    "SNNNNNNN---FFFFFFF--SNNNNNFFFFFF"
     
    Last edited: Jun 14, 2018
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  5. slc

    slc Senior Member

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    "How do we like our new fly sheet?"

    "It's mine. Can I have some socks?"

    "WHAT?"

    "Emmett says he saw a horse wearing tube socks on his legs. He never got any flies on his legs."

    "You want tube socks???"

    "Zebra pattern. With sparkles."
     
    Last edited: Jun 14, 2018
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  6. slc

    slc Senior Member

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    "I want my socks."

    "Look, if the neighbors see you wearing zebra sparkle socks they are going to NEVER EVER let me forget it."

    "I want my socks."
     
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  7. slc

    slc Senior Member

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    "What have you been doing all day anyway?"

    "Working. Building a huge gate."

    "Why?"

    "So you, HOUDINI, do not ESCAPE."

    "I have no interest in escaping. I have it good here. Anyway, you should spend more time with me."

    "Why? Something wrong?"

    "I have a mosquito bite."

    "Where?"

    "On my - here....."(points with nose)

    "Oh for heaven's sake Wuss Horse, I'm not SCRATCHING YOU THERE!!!!"

    (Points with nose) "It really itches."

    "I am NOT scratching that!"

    "You should. It's kinda hard for me to reach. I haveta do this....."

    (indescribable).
     
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  8. slc

    slc Senior Member

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    "GAAAAAH! WUSS HORSE!"

    "Whut?"

    "Don't you see that gross snake in your hay??? I have to take all your hay away!"

    "WHAT??? WAIT!!!"

    "No, no no, all this has to go, stop eating it!"

    "WHY?"

    "Because there is a putrid rotting stinking snake in it!"

    "That? That's an appetizer. I need some A-1 Steak Sauce."

    "YOU GIVE ME THAT THING!"

    "LA LA LA LA LA !"

    "Oh my GOD! Put that down you!"

    "EEE eeee eeee eee!"

    "THAT IS DISGUSTING! I'm throwing away all this hay!"

    "WHAT?"

    "I'll give you more."

    "WHEN??"

    "Like two seconds! Look, you don't want botulism do you?"

    "What's that?"
     
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  9. slc

    slc Senior Member

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    "Wuss Horse, are you asleep?"

    "Well, I uz lying down, but I'm just thinking. Is pony going to be okay?"

    "I don't think so."

    "He's rubbing his eye."

    "Yeah buddy, I'm waiting for the vet."

    "You still got me, right?"

    "Yeah buddy. But everyone in the herd matters. Even the little guys."

    "Maybe especially the little guys. Maybe that's why they make the big guys."

    "Why's that, Wuss Horse?"

    "To take care of the little guys. And the two leg ones."
     
  10. ginster

    ginster Senior Member

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    Oh no..poor pony!
     

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