Anxious/disrespectful mare

Discussion in 'Horse Training' started by Nyshka93, Feb 21, 2019.

  1. Nyshka93

    Nyshka93 Registered

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    hi everyone,

    I would love some insight into my situation! I’ve recently been using a new horse after I lost my mare to colic last fall. I had my last mare for 15 years and we had an amazing, trusting, respectful bond. We really clicked together and I could trust her with my life.

    My new mare seems to be the polar opposite of that. She is extremely anxious, to the point where it is disrespectful. She is extremely sour being away from other horses, and just gets herself so insanely wound up. And it sounds horrible but it’s very hard to find it enjoyable when I feel like I can only ever go to the barn after 5pm when I know all the horses are already in for the night. Because God forbid I try take her in the barn by herself mid day, she just sways in the cross ties screaming looking around and pooping every 30 seconds. The mare is not young either, and has always been this way. Then there are just a bunch of other behaviours; she can only be walked on the lead with the chain over her nose because she’s prancing all over, trying to do up her bridle while she’s decided it’s time to walk away, thank God she’s small because to get on it’s a matter of getting her to stand there for 2 seconds so you can throw your leg over as quick as possible before she’s off again.

    And honestly she is pretty well trained under saddle. She can be hot and forward but once she gets going she’s actually pretty cute. I know bonds and trust and things don’t just happen over night. But I would be lying if I said it isn’t so difficult going from having a horse that you were so close and bonded to and could just leave ground tied for hours while doing whatever with, to having to keep your chained lead on while your horse is in the cross ties screaming in your ear

    I want to enjoy this mare, I really do. And I do know she has potential. I would just like to start at easing her anxiety and making her more easy to deal with on the ground. I don’t like constantly feeling like I’m around a ticking time bomb or if I’m tacking her up and someone takes their horse out of the barn she is going to explode. It’s just not enjoyable.

    Any pointers on how I can help this mare have “more chill”?

    Thank in advance!
     
  2. ~tiffy~

    ~tiffy~ Senior Member

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    Work her mind. You are bending to her will. It should be the other way around.
     
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  3. ~tiffy~

    ~tiffy~ Senior Member

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    If she won’t stand at the mounting block for more than 2 seconds while you hurry to get on, make her stand. She moves, move her back. Wash. Rinse. Repeat.
    Get her mind on you. Keep her mind on you. Don’t think of this as a bonding thing, it’s a training thing.
     
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  4. Lopinslow

    Lopinslow Senior Member

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    I don't believe in that whole "bond" thing... its simply respect.

    first, I would be looking for a different horse to ride, as she sounds like a real treat (not).
    first, bring her in that barn alone, tie in her in her stall and LET her have a hissy fit, she'll get over it. don't LET her walk all over you like she is, and find an instructor to help you learn to deal with this horse
     
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  5. Dream27

    Dream27 Senior Member

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    There has got to be a different/better horse for you. My sister's Paso Fino is just like that and most of the time, I want to pop her over the head. She is just a disrespectful witch who is the most herd bound creature I've ever seen, and I don't have time nor the want to work with a 16 year old horse who was never taught proper manners. Thankfully she is a pasture pet and I don't have to interact with her much, but when I do it's very aggravating. I've done the "leave her tied...she'll get over it"....and she doesn't. She could be left for 12 hours straight, every day and I think she would still pace around, paw, call to everyone and make a ruckus. Your horse sounds just like her, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

    If she was my horse and was supposed to be my fun hobby that I enjoy...I would sell her faster than she could blink and I'd get a new prospect to work with. (Thankfully all my other horses are very respectful because I trained them and don't let them get away with ridiculous behavior)

    This one of yours doesn't sounds like she's not worth the time and effort to fix..and sometimes you can't really fix those older ones who have gotten so ingrained in being disrespectful and herd bound.
     
  6. emali06

    emali06 Senior Member

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    She sounds so annoying lol. If she checks out physically (cysts etc), I would start leaving her tied for long periods of time. Do not allow her to walk all over you and don't go where she wants to go. Ground work will also help with this. Waylon use to be like this but I worked long and hard at getting control of each corner and keeping his attention on me. I leave him tied for a couple hours if I have to. If he wants to pace around, thats his own problem. Soon enough he learns to stand still.
     
  7. ginster

    ginster Senior Member

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    Ground work, ground work, ground work. She has no respect for you, you are not the boss mare to her. That is why she is a pain to lead or to get on.
     
  8. foxtrot

    foxtrot Senior Member

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    I am in the camp of find a horse that is more fun.

    Am I right in reading your wording that you don't OWN this horse, you're just riding or leasing her?

    If so, -definitely- find something else to ride. Riding is always supposed to be fun, but especially now if you're grieving for your old horse, you shouldn't have to put up with a sour horse when there are so many kind, fun ones out there.
     
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  9. Alsosusieq2

    Alsosusieq2 Senior Member

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    Since you're only just using her, switch her out for a different lease. I wouldn't mess with her as a lease.
     
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  10. palogal

    palogal Senior Member

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    All of this. She’s spoiled and been accommodated. If she isn’t yours, the owner needs to send her to a trainer that will move those feet until she learns respect and her place in the world. There is no reason a mare should need a stud chain or that she should be hollering on the cross ties.

    I don’t buy the bond thing either. It’s respect and the horse understanding/responding to your nonverbal cues. It takes time and practice.
     

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