Am I with my perfect horse?

Discussion in 'Horse Chat' started by DesyLovesHorses, Jan 9, 2017.

  1. Kiesha

    Kiesha Full Member

    Oct 16, 2016
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    Desy, I know exactly what you're saying. My AQHA gelding is an ex Ranch/Barrel horse, so he has speed, but he's also able to be turned down to where a 6-year-old can ride him around. If you really want a new horse, I'd look for something like him. Well trained (too well trained for a heavy-handed beginner, granted. Too many buttons to push!), quiet when you want him to be, but able to be turned on to a 'hot' horse just by adjusting your hands and seat. My horse isn't nutty in the slightest, but he's definitely a fun ride!
  2. slc

    slc Senior Member

    Feb 19, 2004
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    "It's a poor workman that blames his tools." That's an old saying. Novices often wish for ''more challenging'' horses when they don't challenge themselves. When they don't challenge themselves, they blame the horse.

    All the things you list that are a ''problem'' with this horse, are a result of your training. If the horse is not responsive ''enough'', that's due to how you ride her. Riding is training, for better or for worse.

    If she doesn't ''come up to the gate for a hug", maybe that's because you haven't really created a good relationship with her. Perhaps she was abused before you got her. Or you have, not intentionally, perhaps, ''trained'' her to stay away from you.

    I have a ''standoffish'' horse. She comes up to me when I call her. Because I taught her to. No, she doesn't like hugs. She likes quiet conversation and a gentle stroke on the neck. You need to learn to adjust yourself to each horse - that's what the process of becoming a real horseman (or horsewoman) really is. You learn to take what each horse has to give, to learn from each horse, and to value each horse, for what they are.

    You say you don't jump, but that it's the horse that is not ''challenging enough''. It really sounds like you're the one who hasn't challenged yourself.

    Challenges are things you create for yourself, within yourself. If you don't feel you're getting challenged enough, take jumping lessons. Take dressage lessons. Learn cutting, or reining. Train for an endurance ride.

    You have a sound, healthy horse that you are able to ride. I'd suggest you keep her. And work out the issues you have. Because if you get a more ''challenging'', ''nuttier'' horse, you'll have much worse problems.
    Last edited: Jan 11, 2017
    SaddleUp158 likes this.
  3. StarPattern

    StarPattern Senior Member

    Jul 29, 2011
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    Be careful what you wish for. I have both ends of the spectrum - a standoffish horse and one that will meet me at the gate. Both are lovely, but I vastly prefer my aloof mare. She's just so stoic and independent. Nothing phases her and she's just as happy to be alone as she is with a herd. I can take her away from her herd without an issue or I can work her within sight and she's never distracted or silly. A horse that meets you at the gate is also likely to be herd bound and that's never a fun problem to deal with. I can't take her away from the farm without fireworks and heaven forbid she's too far from their sight. I enjoy how affectionate she is, but I always prefer the aloof horses.
    Alsosusieq2 and manesntails like this.
  4. equicrzy

    equicrzy Senior Member

    Aug 15, 2011
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    Hmmm, my mare just might be an oddity. She's a, " meet you at the gate", horse, a horse who loves being around people, but, she's perfectly fine with being taken away from her buddy, or, with him leaving without her.

    She has an, " I don't care" attitude about just about everything.
    manesntails likes this.
  5. Alsosusieq2

    Alsosusieq2 Senior Member

    Mar 30, 2016
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    I would rather have aloof than overly friendly. As I said though, be careful your wish may come true and with a ton of problems.
  6. luvmymosey

    luvmymosey Senior Member

    Oct 8, 2006
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    I went through the opposite of what you are going through. My old mare was a hot horse that all she wanted to do was run run run. She was a constant battle for 8 years trying to get her to slow her tooshy. When her 8th year with me arrived (January) she finally slowed down but that was because of her age(30+), I lost her a month later. She stayed hot pretty much to the day she died. She used to whinny and run to the front of her stall to meet me until that last month.

    The horse I have now is my heart horse I think. He is slow and lazy, one of those old souls. He is 11 years old and has pretty much been there-done that. He is not the bravest horse and needs a confident rider(He is extremely hesitant to ride first, I have to remind him I will protect him) but he will go when asked, I can bring him back to the world when he get excited(the rare times he does) I don't want a hot horse ever again. He even comes up to me to greet me, then he realizes I don't have food on me and walks away. Give me my Pokey boy any day.
    Sam C. likes this.
  7. NBChoice

    NBChoice Senior Member

    May 15, 2014
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    Sublime is the same. He loves attention and being around people all the time, but I can take him away from his friends no problem. It's so nice.

    OP- stick with the horse you have. I wanted a "step up" from my first show horse, so I bought another horse. He ended up being a spazz and not what I had envisioned at all. It did not work out well.
    equicrzy likes this.
  8. DocsLglyBlonde

    DocsLglyBlonde Senior Member

    Mar 11, 2012
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    My mare used to be reactive and hot, and once she was worked up, there was no coming down from it. Granted, I didn't know how to handle her back then. It's now 12 years later, and I much prefer the horse I have and the team we are today. We are not fearful of trying new things and reaching beyond our comfort zones, because we both have the know how and sensibility to handle it. As she's gotten older and more confident, she's become more independent; she is (usually) happy to see me, but isn't needy and easily goes out alone.

    Don't get me wrong, we have learned immensely together, but it took years, with many struggles and near breaking points along the way. Take advantage of the sensibility that your horse has, and learn together. You don't need a "hot" horse to have a horse that isn't lazy and is willing to work and learn with you.
    Sam C. and equicrzy like this.

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